Can you really have it all without doing it all yourself, perfectly? Of course.
It’s not a secret that achieving balance in life is part of happiness… but what subconscious beliefs do you perhaps have that are preventing you from accessing your fullest potential as a human, a family member, a business owner?
In this special episode, we took an excerpt from our fire presentation, The Planning Extravaganza, where we were talking about the true nature of achieving balance when you have a lot of priorities.
Clarity about what’s important to you, and the willingness to “be that weirdo” as you approach solving the dilemma of not enough hours in the week for everything is critical if you’re going to build a sustainable and enjoyable business, and it’s not talked about enough in business.
Often it’s about how many leads you can get, how many sales you can close… and as I write this I’m trying to think of a task in your business that doesn’t benefit from you being much clearer-headed, conscious, supported, and higher performing.
If you’re in fights at home because you aren’t making enough money, how are you going to close the sale?
If you’re exhausted beyond belief because you are burning the candle at both ends (waking early and staying up late), how are you going to write the copy for your business?
If you’re anxious that your personal health will be compromised if you go “all in” on your business success, how are you going to really bring your best performance to the table?
There’s a dangerous notion out there that you have to be “self-made” and independence means that you are alone on this journey…
As a mom of 4, wife, breadwinner, business-owner, I’m here to tell you that attitude of “by myself perfectly” is extremely toxic, and completely unrealistic. I’m a HUGE fan of getting help for the things that I want done that I don’t want to do….
But that takes intention.
It takes understanding what you have to do to create the environment where that is a possibility.
It takes realizing that no one is going to volunteer for free to fix what’s broken. You have to invest.
You have to invest time, energy, thoughtfulness, and of course, money.
That’s usually where getting help breaks down for people “I don’t have the money”.
That may be true for today. So the question becomes, what do you need to do differently to create the liquidity to make that a possibility?
When I realized how affordable a home cleaning service was, and how investing in that service was supporting a family, my attitude toward hiring help completely changed.
In this episode, I’m going to share how a mom (of 3 at the time) balanced childcare with a job that required me to travel Monday through Thursday 46 weeks per year, and what the mindset of my decision making had to be.
Get the full vlog, transcript, and mp3 at https://bit.ly/3nnfoFr
Transcript of Podcast - JAN. 10, 2021
So how you do one thing is how you do everything. Who knows, who said it, but it gets repeated a lot. When you think about your biggest priority, I'm going to ask you for your biggest business priority. You know, what is that? Show that out in the chat, what is your biggest business priority in 2021 CEO? The biggest one,
the one that you're gonna, you're going to accomplish, and you're going to put 80% of your energy toward. So if that's where 80% of your energy goes, how many of you are willing to sacrifice your personal health to make sure, sure. That happens. How many of you are willing to sacrifice your family to make sure that it happens? I'm obviously being facetious.
Okay. If you don't know me very well, I've got many children at young ages. I'm married to someone. I love, I, I very, very blessed in that. I really like when I was starting my coaching business, one of my biggest goals was to get Chris the hell out of his corporate job. It was just sucking his soul dry.
Right? Not saying that, you know, somebody else can't be happy in their corporate job. He was unhappy in that role. He is now crazy, happy in the role that he has and working in our business. And like, that was just, that was super important to me. You know? And yeah, I mean, I think we've all been there at some point where we were maybe way out of balance.
And so as you think about this top priority, what do you have to make sure you are also doing to not take away from that priority? Oh, you got to have work-life balance and I'm like, what the hell does that even mean? What does that really mean? I don't really love that as a, as a term because it makes it sound like everything's an opposition.
I like to think of things as integration. It's all holistic. It's like a, it's like a rising tide that lifts all boats. It all has to work together. So if you are not successful in business, because you believe that it's taking away from your family, you will never be successful in business. If you believe that being successful with your family will take away from your business.
You will never be successful with your family. Right? And like, who wants to sign up for a one-dimensional life? Right job.<inaudible> in the chat. If you're like, Hey, I got to have this multifaceted life. That's just, I wanted to be multifaceted. I want to be, multi-faceted not multitasking, but multifaceted. Right? And when you're multifaceted,
it allows you to create as much space as you need for all the things you can literally like you can do all, you can do all the things rather that matter the most to you. Can you do everything according to society's expectations of what an ideal perfect person in every realm and arena and situation can be no, let me save you some work. No,
you cannot. But society, isn't going to be on your deathbed society. Isn't going to be your family, right? Society is not going to be your self love, right. People posting crazy shit on the internet is not going to be there to keep you warm. Right. And so we have to find that multi-dimensional that multifaceted person. Who's not just a leader of a company,
but as a leader of themselves and has fulfillment and the things that will always be there. Cause I mean like let's, let's be really honest. If something catastrophic happened to your business, could you build a new one, shout out in the chat? What's the answer to that question? If something catastrophic happened, like, I don't know, Facebook burned down or,
or your state suddenly decided to revoke everybody's business license. Right. Let's just get crazy here. And just, and like the likelihood of this is super low, but if something like catastrophic happened, or maybe somebody sued you and you didn't get insurance and you didn't have a lawyer and they were right and you end up losing everything like is if you lose the family,
you don't get it back. Right. If you lose the, if you lose the regard for self, it's hard to get it back. Right. So, so you have to understand when it comes to life integration and achieving goals, it's not about sacrificing who you are as a full person to achieve that. But it does sometimes mean that you have to do things differently.
It does sometimes mean that you have to do things differently. So for example, when I was working 46 weeks a year as a consultant and I was on an airplane, I would fly four hours away to drive another hour to go to my client's site. And then I would be on the client's site. Monday through Thursday, I get on a late flight on Thursday and fly home.
I still had kids. Right. I still had kids now, could I personally walk my kids to school in the morning? No, I couldn't. I was in another state. Right. So I couldn't do that. But we at the time had pairs who were responsible for that portion of things, right. I had to do things differently to make it work.
And I chose to do it in a way that worked for us. And society would say that I was a shit mom, right? Society would say that I was not a good mom in those years. And I would say whatever society, because you know what? My kids are so well adjusted. You know, they know how to talk to adults.
They, they, they, my seven year old is a dangerous salesman. Okay. Don't let him, don't, don't let him sell to you. You will end up giving him something. Right. He's so good at it. And part of it is, is that he's, he's grown up in an environment where he can navigate, you know, that world and it's cool.
And we like that. And that's awesome for us. And we get to define them. Does that make sense for you? You might not be okay with the opere situation for you and that's okay. And you're not bad. You're not weak. You're not known like you do. You it's about achieving a holistic solution. And just recognizing that you might have to do things a little differently than other people.
Coaching business example. I was just talking to somebody who enrolled in our accelerator program. And she shared with me, like, I don't want to have to do a ton of video. Like if you tell me I have to do live videos every day I'm out. And I was like, you don't have to do video. Do you have to do something?
Hell yes, you have to do something. Right? You have to do something, but you can do it in different ways. Like you could do written copy. You could do images. You could do zoom meetings instead of live streams. Like there's so many options and ways to get things done, but you have to be willing to do it a little differently.
So shout out weird in the chat. If you recognize that your particular solution for how your going to go about achieving this balance this year, that's yours. You get to decide you're the boss. You are the boss. You get to be weird. Right. And your parents don't have to understand it. Your siblings don't have to understand it. Your friends don't have to understand it for sure.
Your social feed. Doesn't have to understand it. Right. You have to understand it. You have to understand why you're okay with the trade-offs right. No one got anywhere in life by not making a trade off. Right. But at the same time, you've got to make the trade offs you want to make, you know, I was just talking with my son this morning.
We haven't had old pairs for like three years now, but he was talking to me about the memories he shared with the people who lived with us at that time and how special each one of them were to us. And, you know, I think people will be very quick to judge because they, they wouldn't make the same decision because they have a different circumstance and level of expectation.
But I think if there's, if there's another thing 2020 is really taught us is we have to embrace it. We're not meant to have the exact same life as each other. You know, we shouldn't expect everybody to just conform to one way of doing things and the more okay you can be with what your special sauce, your special solution is the better off you're going to be.